Not Your Average Villain
by xxxPiratePrincessxxx
Summary: A collection of fluffy one-shots and vignettes concerning our favourite blue villain and the beautiful Roxanne, WITH TWISTS! Pairings - MegamindxRoxanne
1. Linked Arms

The hulking gorilla-esque frame of Minion the alien fish almost danced as he cleared away dirty bowls and utensils into the sink, prancing over to a beeping appliance seated on a nearby table and flipping open the hinged door. Minion carefully lifted the tray of hot chocolate chip cookies out of the oven, the tiny pieces of cocoa melting onto the warm metal tray. Humming as he took off his precautionary 'World's Best Minion' oven gloves (courtesy of a certain blue master), the automaton fish slid open the circular panel on the top of his fishbowl, and, grasping one of the soft, brown delicacies off of the tray, lifted it to drop into the water -

"BWAHAHAHAA!"

The fish jolted involuntarily, crushing the cookie between his steel fingertips as Roxanne Ritchi's laughter reverberated around the spacious lair. A few brainbots peered curiously over the dormant computer screen panel as Minion forlornly looked at the crumbs dotting his palm, taking a moment to glare over his shoulder at an ordinary door behind which cackling still issued. Sighing, Minion slipped off the oven gloves and tipped the cookies into a waiting bowl.

"I really hate that photo album."

Megamind was folded awkwardly into a chair, quite the difference from his normal evil-overlord throne, looking sheepish but cute in a simple black tee as he tried not to blush too hard as his guest - no, **girlfriend**, convulsed in giggles at every over-dramatised newspaper article behind the crackling plastic sleeves of a photo-album on the table in front of them.

Her slender arm had gradually twined around his as they read his photo album, possibly the only plus of this catastrophically BAD idea insinuated by none other than his large-headed blue self. _Well_, he thought grudgingly as Roxanne threw back her head and let loose another stream of bubbly laughter, _Maybe not such a bad idea._

"God, did I really FAWN over him like that? Hey, Megamind? Still with me?"

The aforementioned alien looked over at the reporter, and was stunned momentarily into silence by the impossible luminescence gleaming from her cerulean irids. Her azure orbs were truly unique - sapphire threads of light bled into the deep, almost-black centre, and as she smiled shyly, her cheeks grew rosy, a wash of soft pink blooming over the round apples and tinting the shallow slopes of her pointed nose dewy with shadow and healthiness.

"Bow-tiful," he forced out, involuntarily speaking the word bouncing around, pushing all other of his extensive thoughts to the sides of his cavernous skull as Roxanne, his Roxanne, looked properly at him without disgust or confusion in those goddamn gorgeous eyes.

The blush deepened and she surprised him by letting out a soft giggle, slipping out of her bow lips like a hurried whisper. He felt the vibration travel across their linked arms and he was suddenly very aware of her unhurried, steady breathing, her chest heaving up and down and the light cotton she wore creasing at the delicate curve of her waist and dipping at her ample hips, her shapely leg practically pressed against his.

"Bow-tiful?" she parrotted, and she giggled again, and this time he joined her, his awkwardness vanishing as they laughted and laughed at practically nothing at all.

The photo album lay quite forgotten that day.


	2. Inked Heart

"Will that be all, Mr Stark?"

"That'll be all, Miss Potts."

_Awkwardness, _Megamind mused, _is watching Iron Man with your girlfriend and not paying the slightest attention to it. _

His darling Roxanne had flopped, quite ungracefully, onto his lap, her head cradled in the skinny curve of his lap and strands of chocolate-brown, streaked with cinnamon threads, falling over her forehead and spilling onto his newly-acquired dark jeans. They were squashed together on his too small couch, complete with black leather and cup-holders, and pretending to each other that they were concentrating on the red-and-gold superhero whizzing about on screen.

His hands were behind the giant dome of his head, her hands tapping out a tuneless rhythm on the sofa and the rest of her lithe body draped over the armrest, her heavy lower body half-on half-off of the couch. She wriggled a little in his lap to get comfortable, and the tips of his ears and sharp nose flushed the colour of an over-ripe blackberry as that movement managed to make one of his less courteous body parts become – excited.

"Blue," she grinned; completely unaware of the effect she had on him as she pushed herself up properly to press closer to him. "This is my favourite part."

"I'm sure it's **undenilaby **romantic," he remarked dryly, and she smacked his arm (which had suddenly appeared around her shoulders) playfully, sending him into a smiling silence as she gazed, absorbed, at the massive 72-inch screen.

He let out a half-hearted huff and settled back onto the cushions, curiosity piqued by his girlfriend's interest in this scene. 

Tony Stark, the film's protagonist, had just received a package from Pepper, the intriguingly-named assistant of his who had now wandered off screen to some place upstairs. Strangely enough, although no romantic exchange had gone on between them, Roxanne seemed to predict a relationship for these two, to which Megamind was baffled. They had barely had a non-formal conversation – therefore, there was no logical chemistry between them.

He'd told her that the first time they had watched the movie, in the empty theatre of the nearby cinema, emptied sneakily by a stern looking Minion with his arms crossed outside the door. He still remembered the strange, intense way she'd looked at him then, and twined her slender fingers with his long ones, saying that love wasn't always logical. To this day, he still didn't know what she meant by 'love'.

On the TV, Stark flipped open the cardboard box she'd given him, and drew out from within the circular arc reactor (which Megamind had secretly been trying to duplicate in his lair), the one which he had built inside the confines of the caves, but around the once-tarnished edges read the words 'Proof that Tony Stark has a Heart'. He felt Roxanne sigh gently beside him, and she leaned against him, closing her eyes. Her sweet lips seemed to quiver for a minute, then, burying her head into his narrow chest, she breathed a whisper into his cape.

Frowning, he tried to ask her what she had said, but she seemed to snap out of her reverie and shushed him, saying he was spoiling the film.

Movie night ended like it always ended – Megamind falling asleep on the couch, Roxanne slipping out from under him and tucking a blanket around his skinny frame, wishing a goodnight to Minion as she went home to her high-rise apartment, ready to wake again at 9.00 sharp for her busy day as Metro City's news anchor.

He was shaken awake by Minion a half hour after 9.00, so he could, as he always did, get ready for another day alternately saving the city and having coffee with Miss Ritchi.

"Oh, not now, Minion," Megamind moaned, pulling the blanket over his impressive skull. "Can't you see I'm dreaming of building an arc reactor?"

"Virtually impossible, sir." Minion replied cheerfully, switching the blanket back down so his master's bleary, aggrieved green eyes could be seen glaring over the edge of the brown fabric.

"Besides, your 10 o'clock fight is scheduled with Beaver Boss, remember?"

"That amateur booby?" the blue alien snorted. "He's not worth my time."

"No," Minion admitted, waggling his eyebrows. "But Miss Ritchi's going to be covering it, and I don't think she'll be too pleased if you don't show..." Megamind winced, and, after a moment, slowly pushed the blanket aside, grumbling under his breath.

"You manipliative, dastardly fish," he muttered, tugging the lapels of his cape straight.

"**Manipulative**, sir. And yes, I try." Minion replied, giving a toothy smile. Megamind waved him away grumpily, and the traitor sauntered off, probably to prep the invisible car.

He reached to tug the cape off, but stopped short as he glimpsed something red painted beneath his shirt. Apprehensive, Megamind pulled it off and gaped in surprise at the quite artfully drawn heart emblazoned on the left side of his chest, inked in black and filled in with a red marker that still lay silently on the armrest nearest his head. A note had been taped to the drawing with sellotape – he took it off in a sharp pull. Six words written in flowing script had been printed on the yellow post-it, and it took a while for his magnificent brain to absorb them.

_Proof that Megamind has a heart. _

Roxanne shielded her eyes from the sun, a stray ray slipping through her pressed fingers and illuminating her eyes with a shining blue halo. Rows of tower blocks ran across the filled street, crowds gathering behind the barriers to watch another famed brawl between their hero and yet another amateur villain, probably hoping to fill his predecessor's spiked boots.

Derek, the new camera guy, was busy twiddling with the sound system, a short stocky man with a mullet and a killer smile. He looked up now from his work, and his thick lips split open at her, revealing even, perfect teeth. She returned his smile and nervously smoothed down her dress over her hips, the material crackling under her palms. It was a sunny day in Metro City, there was no denying it, but a chill breeze still whipped under her short emerald number, the dipping hemline not enough to protect her knees from the relentless frost-laced wind.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something invisible draw up behind her, and she ducked with well-practised ease under Minion's grabbing arms, choosing instead to discreetly disappear behind the car door and flit inside before anyone particularly observant could see her.

Megamind grinned hugely at her from across the expensive interior of the car, fully clad out in costume, eyeliner streaked under his irises. It struck her for a moment that her dress was exactly the same shade as the verdant orbs staring so happily at her now.

"Watch," he said softly, and zipped his suit open down the middle, shrugging it off his shoulders.

Roxanne was not a completely innocent person. She'd dated, who hadn't? She'd had her heart broken, she'd been stood up – and goodness knows, with a body like hers, she'd had her share of bedroom time. But with Megamind – before a show – in the back of the invisible car – the very thought made her feel hot and her fingertips buzzed, and something stirred violently in her stomach.

"B-blue, I d –" She stopped midway sentence, and now it was her turn to be stunned as she beheld the seven letters scrawled jaggedly over the heart drawing she'd inked on his chest before she left the previous night.

Reaching over, Megamind took her small hand loosely in his, and then placed it over the inked heart, just over her name that he had written in spidery, certain strokes across his chest.

Megamind absorbed the soft, trembling look on her face, like she was about to melt under his touch, and gathered his fleeing courage before it scattered at her watery, poignant azure eyes. Moving even closer, he whispered into her ear the three words he pretended he hadn't heard her say the night before.

Minion rolled his eyes impatiently as the back of the invisible car was suddenly very, very noisy.


	3. First Kiss

It obliterated every practical thought in her head, and heightened all her senses so that light and colour flashed in startling clarity and every sound and taste and smell was tangible to her fingertips, such was the height of Roxanne's happiness. It filled her, literally, like solidified air or liquid sky so that she floated and bounced everywhere, and when he withdrew his lips from hers, she could see the sheer emotion she was feeling reflected at her in those bright, green eyes.

"Wow," he murmured, tracing her reddened lips with one tapered finger. "Wow." she agreed, breathing heavily.

She could feel the ridges in her skin where she'd pushed up against the granite wall, feel the breath in her throat catch endlessly every time she remembered the softness of his open mouth, and she near exploded when she recalled that shy, dextrous tongue gently tangling with hers. Roxanne, a fully grown twenty five year old woman, felt like an airheaded schoolgirl, high on the wave of her first kiss.

"We should do that more often," Megamind said softly, the strength slowly returning to his ecstasy-weakened limbs, unclenching the hand he'd unconsciously wound firmly into the russet feathers of hair at the nape of Roxanne's neck. She giggled quietly and carefully levered herself away from the slab of stone behind her, trying to stop the spasms lurching across her hips and forearms.

She watched Megamind curiously as he shakily smoothed down his crumpled cape, wondering how on earth he had this effect on her.

It had all started when they revisited the lair after the mayor reopened the newly crowned 'Megamind' museum.

Minion was off recalibrating the brainbots (the battle with Titan had wiped out half of them completely) and Roxanne was left shifting awkwardly in the swivel chair as Megamind busied himself shutting down the floor-to-ceiling machinery, both of them a little puzzled and weirdly nostalgic at how events had passed so quickly, how the lair now didn't represent the hideaway of an outcast and the temporary station of a hostage, but was now the home of where good would blossom like a unfurling flower, the place where Roxanne Ritchi could finally, strangely, be at peace.

When at last the final dial had been switched off, the two were left face to face, plunged into complete darkness apart from a shaft of light spilling from the door Minion had left cracked slightly open. Roxanne stood, as insubstantial as the still-quivering petals of the opening flower, illuminated by the only narrow strip of light in the room as Megamind slowly walked toward her.

He stood uncertainly in the shadows, on the very edge of darkness, hovering and staring with an almost nervous expression at the woman rooted before him. Roxanne knew in that instant, with blackness all around her and his shining emerald eyes in front, what to do. Very purposefully, she held out her hand. There was one long, deafening moment. Megamind, the hero, the protector of Metro City slipped his gloved fingers into her palm, and stepped forth to claim the mantle of light lingering in the recesses of his past lair.

Still with his hand twined with hers, Roxanne saw his radiance, his beauty, with his past swept away like a shadow under a torch beam, and a single tear ran unchecked down her cheek as she reached up and kissed him, kissed him fiercely and passionately with every fibre of her soul, kissed away the taunts and jeers, the ghosts, with a steady flow of tears running down both their faces, as one and together as any man and woman could be.

Suddenly there was a wall behind her and there was leather everywhere, chafing against her arms as she threw them round his neck and enveloping her in an envelope of cool, smooth fabric as it swirled with his rapid movements and her desperate scrabbling at every visible body part he possessed. She didn't restrain anything except that which she thought might push them too far – but, how could you go further than the embers of love, which was in essence insanity itself? Crazy, wild, and oh so blissful insanity, that Roxanne Ritchi was experiencing full on with a man she had thought but a year ago – hell, a WEEK ago, was perhaps the object of eternal loathing for her.

So how was it that he did this? Drove her insane at this climax of emotions, as bad and wicked as he once pretended to be as she carelessly bruised her lips and raked her fingernails across the smooth round curve of his giant blue head. "Roxanne," he whispered raggedly between frantic kisses. "Megamind..." she moaned back, beyond caring.

And now, as they both were steadying themselves against each other, Roxanne gazed wondrously into those huge, sheer eyes, and truly understood how this man had this effect on her, that no other had ever touched upon, that thrill that only he had generated, and only she could be privy too.

He'd saved her – not the mere effort it took to rescue her physically, but he'd drawn her out of a life without madness, without clarity, without life, without –

"Love," Roxanne breathed, eyes shining, her lips forming barely a sound. And it was then that Roxanne Ritchi knew that she was madly, impossibly, fantastically in love with Megamind. And the best part? The best part, Roxanne would dreamily recall in the future, was when he heard her whisper, leant down, and said, so sweetly, so clearly – "I love you, Roxanne Ritchi."

And

that

was how

he had

the effect

on her.

And did so, forever more.


	4. ALERT!

Hello fellow readers!

Just a quick poll, about my next RoxanneXMega fic, and also a MASSIVE thank you for all the faves, alerts, and reviews! Please, all that alert, the review button would inspire me for quicker updates, believe me :D

I'm hoping to do a 'Megamind gets a pet' fic next (squee) and I'm lost on which pet would suit him best. So I'm asking my darling readers to post a review and feed me some ideas! The person with the best idea will get reviews, faves, and lots more on their stories, as well as a winning message from yours truly! If I can't choose the best idea, the pet choice that is the most popular will be chosen, so all those involved will get a winning message! I'm waiting till next week for the reviews to fill in, so it's all up to YOU guys!

Best of luck, and please, review!

xPPx


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